Happy UnValentines day, Booth and Brennan
by wildlilpony
Summary: My take on the Valentines day ep. A woman gets shot in the heart. 'This outfit reminds me of the french maid outfit you have...' Brennan's valentines day plans fall through, so Booth and Brennan spend Valentines day together. How will they celebrate?


Happy Un-Valentines Day to you, Booth and Brennan.

Disclaimer. I dont own Bones. Bones will always belong to Fox, HH and Kathy reichs.

Booth hands Brennan a cup of coffee as they got out of the car he looks around in stunned silence at the decorations around the Jeffersonian. Valentines day, he groaned. For a moment he'd forgotten. Red hearts, flowers and streamers adorned the ceilings, as well as plastic cupids and angels that floated around every corner. It had never bothered him before but now he found himself feeling almost angry; even though he had no reason to be angry at his colleagues and everyone in the world in general, although he did have a reason to be angry at a certain someone he did not want to think about right now. As they walked into the Jeffersonian Booth and Brennan watched couples kissing and hugging. They heard a woman squealing 'Oh my god,' as the guy handed her a bunch of big red roses. She immediately planted a kiss on his lips. Brennan glanced at Booth for a few seconds then took put her arm around him for a second in a comforting gesture. Booth glanced down at the hand on his for a few seconds.

'I've never really liked flowers; I've never seen the point.' said Brennan.

Booth smiled slightly. 'Thats because you're a smart woman. Valentines day is about celebrating your love for someone.' replied Booth.

'Then why do you have to celebrate it on one day a year? Why not show someone how much you love them everyday? asked Brennan softly. Valentines day is all about commercialism. A day to get people spending as much money as possible. Its not about love, its about...chocolates.'

Booth looked at Brennan when she said that and actually laughed. Brennan looked at him in shock trying to figure out why he was laughing.

'What Booth? What did i say?'

Booth put his arm around her, 'Oh Bones. Valentines day is about chocolate. I'll have to remember that next time.'

'Next time...?' Brennan asked but Cam interrupted their conversation abruptly. Booth glanced at the dress Cam was wearing and he groaned when he looked at her significant other standing a few feet away. He had thought that once they entered the lab, the place of reason, he would have escaped the commercialism of Valentines day. He groaned to himself and muttered under his breath, I hate Valentines day. But Brennan was the only one who heard him.

'This is a major disaster. I was about to go out, but then the FBI dropped this on our doorstep. She almost glared at Booth. Booth had to smile a little bit, but ruining Cam's day didnt make him feel very happy.

'Oooh. What happened to you?' Brennan asked the bloody body on the table. She glanced at the torn clothing and at the big hole in her chest with the arrow protruding out of it.

Booth looked too and winced. 'There you go. Someone else who obviously hates Valentines day, huh Bones? Happy Valentines day, Bones. Just the way you like it.'

Hodgins and Angela walked in and groaned when they saw the body on the table.

'Oh no, someone got killed on Valentines day?' asked Angela, picking up and eating a handful of popcorn from the big bowl she had in her hands.

'Someone obviously didnt like their present.' quipped Hodgins.

Brennan gave them a look. There's nothing to be happy about, Booth. Or sarcastic about, she said to Angela and Hodgins. Show some respect. A woman was killed on the happiest day of the year...'

'Yeah the day thats all about chocolates and candy...' Booth said as he burst out laughing.

Brennan laughed with him too. Cam, Hodgins and Angela looked at Booth and Brennan as if they'd gone completely crazy. They're crazy. They've gone completely crazy, Cam said to herself, but she had to smile a little as they laughed together. She hated to stop this but if she continued to allow Brennan and Booth to have an off day they'd never get anything done. 'Okay you two thats enough. I want you to get your act together. I want all of you to solve this case as quickly as possible. Today, in fact. Some of us want to enjoy Valentines day.' Said Cam.

They all looked at the body on the table in silence. Angela looked at the clothes.

'Whoa. Thats some outfit. She was dressing up for someone.' said Angela.

'It reminds me of the french maid outfit you have...' said Hodgins kissing Angela's neck. Brennan and Booth looked up at them, stunned. Booth was desperately trying to get the image of Angela in a french maid outfit out of his head. Otherwise he'd never be able to look at Angela again.

'You Remember last Valentines Day when you showed it off? And then we...' Hodgins continued to give Angela's neck little kisses and then they kissed on the lips.

Booth looked horrified. 'Oh for the love of... We have a body in front of us. How can you get all hot and heavy with a body in front of you?'

Cam looked equally horrified. 'Okay, people. Concentrate on the body in front of you. Not on your hormones. You can get to that later. In the privacy of your home. Not in front of us.'

'Angela i want you to take a look at the outfit more closely. Its pretty torn and tattered. I need you to have a go at piecing them together. And then you can recreate the sequence of events that lead to her death. But before you do that Angela, Hodgins get samples of hair, fibre and any insects that might be on her. We want to find out exactly where she was when it happened. And Cam i need you to help me get this arrow out of her heart with as little disturbance as possible.' Said Brennan.

'Her heart?' Booth asked.

'This woman was shot in the heart with this arrow.' said Brennan.

Everyone stood there for a few seconds in silence. Booth looked gueasy.

Does anyone know the identity of this woman, Booth? Who found her?' asked Brennan.

'She was found by her boyfriend. Came home to find her lying on the bed. What a shock it must have been to him. To find her dead on Valentines day.' He shuddered. Her name was Valerie Namm. 26 Years old.

FBI forensics went through her house; there's some of her belongings over there. I'll go through that if you like.' said Booth.

'Wear gloves.' said Brennan picking up the box with sterile gloves in it.

'Do i have to?'

'Yes. Otherwise perhaps you can go and question the suspects. Do you have any suspects yet?' asked Brennan crisply.

'I would think its obvious. Her boyfriend. She was shot in the heart. Maybe she was having an affair or something, her boyfriend spies on her, sees her cheating and then he shoots her with the arrow. Its an open and shut case. I need you to find the evidence to convict her boyfriend.'

Brennan looked at Booth, glaring. 'Thats not going to happen, Booth. We dont do that. Thats pure fiction, pure conjecture. If you had come home to find your girlfriend had been shot you wouldnt want us to automatically finger you as the likely suspect would you?'

'First of all. It wasnt me. And statistically its almost always the jealous boyfriend that kills his girlfriend. Especially if she's cheating on him or something...'

'That is not true. Where'd you read that Booth?'

Cam groaned as she watched the two of them bicker back and forth.

'Lets get to it.' said Cam. The two of them glared at each other but did their jobs silently.

Booth winced in sympathy when Cam and Brennan pulled out the arrow gently.

'Oh my god...' he groaned.

Booth looked in a box and saw a bunch of video tapes. And then he looked at the one that had been put into an evidence bag. 'Fun with, pup boy.' said Booth out loud and with a puzzled expression on his face..

'So this video was found in her home?' asked Hodgins.

'Yes. There was a hidden entertainment system behind the curtains. We found this video tape in the VCR as well as these boxes of videos in the cabinet there.' said Booth.

Cam went over to the television and slipped the video into the VCR.

Everyone's eyes widened as they watched the victim come out in a catwoman costume carrying a whip and handcuffs. She placed the handcuffs onto the squirming guy who had been previously blindfolded and starting speaking to him in a sultry tone.

'Have you been very naughty? Would you like me to punish you?' And then she smacked the whip on the chair experimentally and then started whipping his butt. 'Yes yes. The man yelled in exctasy. More. More. Get inside me.'

Sweets was walking towards the lab when he heard the cries of excstasy. His mouth went dry as he wondered what was going on. He walked into the lab and saw everyone standing in front of the television, spellbound. He watched as Angela ate popcorn and had to smile as he watched her watching the movie with a big smile on her face.

Booth looked away and blushed. Brennan looked at him in amusement.

'Embarrassed Booth? Oh dont tell me you're a whip and chains virgin. You've never tried that?'

'Not the whips part. Sex is all about pleasure and intimacy, not whips and pain. Said Booth in an almost faint voice. But i have indulged in fantasy. Booth was silent for a few seconds.

'Really. What kind of fantasies? Which part do you like playing?' asked Brennan in curiosity.

'Thats none of your business Bones. Thats for me to know and you to find out. He looked at her, his eyes widened. Wait a minute. What are you saying Bones? You've played with whips and chains before?'

Brennan laughed a little. And Booth looked at her expectantly waiting for her to answer. The smile left his face and he looked shocked.

'I havent played with whips, Booth. Fantasy and handcuffs yes.'

'There's nothing wrong with that Agent Booth. In fact its perfectly normal to try all sorts of things...said Sweets.

Booth looked at him closely.

'We have,' said Angela. Whips, chains. Everything. Its fun. Besides sex is supposed to be fun. And doing the same thing all the time can get pretty boring. You need variety...' said Angela.

'Okay. How did we get onto the subject of our sexual habits?' asked Cam.

'What about you, Cam? asked Angela. What have you done with your hot doctor?'

Cam looked at her cooly. 'I'm not going to answer that. Sex belongs in the bedroom not with multiple people. Sex is between two people. Not between me, my boyfriend and everyone here.'

'Where was the video cam?' Asked Hodgins.

'Hidden in the ceiling fan.' said Booth.

'Thats something i've never tried. We'll have to keep that in mind, wont we Angela?'

She looked at him and giggled. And then she hugged him.

Booth closed his eyes. But he was grinning. He looked at Brennan who was trying to concentrate on the body in front of them but he noticed that she hid a smile.

'Any chance that the murder might have been caught on tape? Who wants to go through them?' asked Brennan.

'Well, we would, but we're busy,' said Hodgins with an impish smile.

'Why dont you and Booth go through them?' said Angela. Who had noticed the impish smile on Hodgins face and had enjoyed Brennan and Booth flirting with each other. She had missed the back and forth banter between Booth and Brennan and wanted to do anything and everything to encourage that.

Sweets glanced at Angela sharply. 'Maybe i should watch them with you. I can give you a lot of psychological insights into the victim.'

'Mmm. I dont know Sweets. A kid watching sex tapes. Thats not a good idea.' said Booth.

'Ha ha. Very funny, Booth. said Sweets, but he was smiling.

Great. Idea. Until we've pieced together the injuries, x-rays and clothes, there's really nothing you can do until then. Enjoy.' said Cam handing Booth the boxes of videos and the tape that was just in the VCR.

'Popcorn?' asked Angela.

'This is not a social hour...' said Brennan blushing but she took the bowl from Angela. Everyone watched them head towards Brennan's office with amused smiles on their faces.

EVERYONE IS STANDING IN FRONT OF ANGELA'S OFFICE, STARING AT THE BIG SCREEN.

'Alright, said Angela. Here's the most likely sequence of events.

They all watched as Angela replays the final scenes of the video that had been found in the VCR. Only this time the scene is played out by Angela and Hodgins. Booth covered his face with his hands but Brennan grabbed his hands away from his eyes and made him watch it. She smiles at him and he grins at her. In the video they finish having sex and then she sends the man on his way. They hear the window smash and the woman gets hit in the heart with the arrow.

'Hodgins and i tested out the depth of the arrows using a dummy. It's unlikely that it was a man. The arrow would have been in more deep. It was only in a few centimetres. Which means that it was most likely a woman, a woman who was at least five feet tall, and has a left side weakness. Right handed. There were a few blonde bits of hair stuck to the arrow and the person who shot the arrow cut her hand on it, throwing the arrow at her.

'We figured out the man in the tape was Matthew Hutchins, the victims sisters boyfriend.' Booth said.

'The victim was having an affair with her sisters boyfriend? Wow. Talk about not her not knowing the sister code.' piped in Angela.

'Five feet tall, left side weakness, Right handed. And blonde. That sounds like Violet Namm. The victims sister. Does the DNA match?' asked Booth.

'Yup. I'm afraid, so. The killer was Violet Namm. You can go and arrest her now Booth. We've got enough evidence to convict her..'

ANGELA, HODGINS, BOOTH AND BRENNAN ARE SITTING IN BRENNANS OFFICE.

'So now that we've solved this case. What are your plans for Valentines day Brennan?' asked Angela.

'I have a dinner date, with Jean Paul. Met him at the bar last week.' said Brennan.

'Really? Where's he taking you? Is he cute?' Squealed Angela.

'He's very physically attractive, yes. And he's taking me to that new restaurant, the one around the block thats just opened. Italian food.' said Brennan.

'Italian food. Yum. Thats so romantic.' said Angela, sighing.

'Hodgins is cooking me dinner. He's become a really great cook. And then after that we can...'

'Oh. Ok. We dont need to hear what you're going to be doing...'interrupted Booth.

'What about you, Booth?

'What about me? said Booth, glaring at Angela.

Everyone looked at him in silence. But they were interrupted by the phone ringing. It was Brennans phone. With a confused expression she answered it. Brennan smiled.

'Well, Hello, Jean Paul. Are you going to be here soon?'

'Uh. Ok. Yes. Thats fine,' said Brennan, her happy smile disappearing. She hung up the phone and looked down for a second.

'Bones? asked Booth. Are you okay?'

'Yes. Fine. He cant make it thats all.' said Bones with a hurt expression.

Booth glanced at the trouble Bones had taken with her appearance and he sighed, feeling a little bit angry that this Jean Paul had hurt her.

'Oh. I'm sorry, Sweetie.' said Angela looking at Brennan in sympathy.

'It's fine. I'm fine.' said Brennan.

Cam walked into the room and looked surprised to see everyone was still there. 'What are you all still doing here? This case is over. Its solved. Its time for you to all go and enjoy your Valentines day.. I'll see you all tomorrow. Have fun!' said Cam.

Angela turned and looked at Brennan and Booth. 'Are you going to be okay, you two?'

'Yes. We'll be fine, Angela. Go and enjoy your Valentines Day,' said Booth. Brennan looked up at Angela, nodded and smiled at her.

Booth leaned back on the couch and looked at her. 'So what excuse did he give, Bones? I hope it was a creative excuse.'

Brennan closed her eyes for a few seconds, and then she answered.

'He said his ex girlfriend came back...

Booths heart slammed into his chest as he saw the sad expression on Bones' face.

I really liked him, you know. And here he just called me and basically said, I cant see you anymore, i'm still in love with my ex girlfriend.'

Booth looked at her in sympathy. What were you saying before Booth? You hate Valentines day? So do I. I HATE Valentines Day! cried out Brennan.

'You know what I need Booth? I need a gun. I can understand how Violet Namm felt. The person she loved and trusted was seeing her sister behind her back. He let her down. Her sister should have had more sense to stay away from her boyfriend...'

'You dont need a gun, Bones. If anyone needs to be shot, i'll shoot them.'

'What if you're not there, Booth? What will i do then?

'Why wouldnt i be there, Bones? asked Booth, as he watched her take her good jacket off and put on a different jacket. She turned her mobile phone off and put it in her handbag as she got ready to go home and then she looked up at him.

'You cant be there 24/7 Booth. Its not possible. Valerie Namm got killed as soon as her sisters boyfriend left. Her boyfriend couldnt protect her, anymore than you can protect me.'

Booth looks at her and sighs. He thought for a few seconds and then he smiles, gets up and takes her hand.

'I know exactly where we can go, Bones. I need my partner tonight.'

Brennan looks at him for a few seconds.

'Do you trust me, Bones?'

She nodded. 'I trust you, Booth.' She said, as she grabbed her handbag and keys with her free hand.

Booth and Bones placed the ear plugs into their ears and grabbed the guns and started shooting at the target. They laughed as they filled the target with holes.

'Thats Jean Paul's head. Joked Brennan. I dont need you. I dont need people who are going to let me down.' cried out Brennan as she shot the target a few more times. Booth followed suit. And then Brennan smiled as the scores came up.

'I won. I won.' Squealed Brennan.

'Whoa. Bones. Remind me never to make you mad.' Joked Booth.

'Did you let me win, Booth?'

'Of course not, Bones. You were lucky thats all. Next time, i'm going to win.'

'Ha ha. Booth. I'm not going to let you win.

Brennan laughed and looked around at the empty room.

'Thanks for bringing me here, Booth. This was a good idea. Happy Valentines Day, Booth.'

'Happy Valentines Day, Bones.'

Brennan leaned over and hugged him. Brennan was about to let him go, but Booth put his arms around her and held her more tightly. Bones leaned her head against Booths shoulder for a minute and then looked up at him. Booth leaned over and kissed her cheek. Brennan sucked in her breath. Booth kissed the side of her mouth and then Brennan turned her head and then Booth kissed her lips. Brennan put her arms around his neck kissing him more deepy. And then Booth gently pulls her to the ground...

_Wicked grin. I know i know. Did they or didnt they? I'm glad i actually finished this story. This is a one shot, but there will be a sequel. I was afraid that i wasnt going to get to post this week. My computer crashed [its only been five months since i bought it, so i wasnt very happy about that] but luckily it only took 24 hrs for the guy to fix it. And its lucky for you, if i hadnt got to post this week i would have posted a few scenes from this fic, rather than the whole story. Theres a two hour limit at the library, i dont think anyone can write a 5+ page story in two hrs. You can write a few scenes and an outline of what you want to happen in the story, but the devils always going to be in the details. The conversations and the details take hours. I wanted to post what i think or would like to happen in this weeks valentines day ep, before the ep airs. Ive kind of gotten hooked on playing the prediction game. Its best not to have very high standards, though, its bones. I've gotten into the habit of not expecting anything. Thats the only way not to get disappointed. _

_I am going to be continuing the picture tells a story, the green eyed monster fic. There are a few more chapters coming. Originally this was going to be chapter two, but this isnt a story about jealousy, at least not between B and B. At any rate there'll be a new chapter next week, hopefully since there wont be a new bones ep till march 3rd there'll be plenty of time for me and others to concentrate on writing. _


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